Choose Your Hard

Have you ever heard the saying that discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons. I know I have. And, I definitely agree. How about you?

Yesterday I was talking with somebody about dieting. More accurately, we were talking about cheating.

It is fine to splurge on Easter. But, day-to-day, how do we keep from giving in to the sugary temptations (the "hourly temptations" as Francis Galton called them)?

I thought of that old saying, "A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips." It is a useful reminder. It is a variation of the idea that discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.

The world's leading expert on self-control is probably Walter Mischel. If you have not already, you should definitely read his book titled The Marshmallow Test.

In the book, Mischel talks about two systems for thinking: hot and cool. The cool system supports self-discipline while the hot system is impulsive. Both are hard.

The hard part of the cool system is resisting the Oreo cookies or chocolate eggs. The hard part of the hot system is living with regret.

I am of the mind that living with regret is much harder than temporary self-control. I think regret is toxic and insidious. And, very often, what we regret are our lapses in self-control.

In no way is this stuff just about eating right. This applies to all of life.

Researchers find that most people get to the end of their lives wishing they had really gone for it. Wishing they had not been controlled by their fears and doubts. Meaning, most people end up with a lot of regret.

Here is the beautiful thing, you get to choose your hard. And, I am convinced that discipline is nowhere near are hard as regret.